Every word contained in Zinna's ASK A VIGILANTE advice column is Zinna's opinion and in no way should cause you to commit acts of violence, lawlessness, recklessness, or other forms of retribution. The best revenge is a good life. When you demonstrate to the dirtbags who threaten your happiness and freedoms, that you are better, smarter, and more successful than they are, you can rest assured that you are driving them insane.

In this context, the word "vigilante" should never be associated with acts of illegality. Vigilante is a term that best describes those who are "vigilant" in the pursuit of whatever it is they choose to protect. By many historical accounts, the term "vigilante" is a derivative of the Latin phrase "Vigiles Urbani." This moniker was attributed to the citizens who patrolled the streets of ancient Rome in order to quickly extinguish the fires that plagued the great city. Consider this historical tidbit, and Zinna's advice, to be a metaphor.

Patrol the streets of your community, and put out the fires that plague your neighborhood. Start by dragging your kids away from the video games and taking them to City Hall. At which time you can inform your local governmental bureaucrats that you and your family will be watching for smoke coming from his or her taxpayer-funded office. Like good little Vigiles Urbani, you, your family, and your friends will respond to the alarm, and arrive at the next public hearing not only looking for the fire that threatens the community, but also the idiot who started it.